My clients struggle as you do. Despite being hardworking, generous, and incredibly persistent, life is hard.
When they first come in, they are hanging in there, barely. They are compassionate givers at heart who find themselves burning out left and right as the world around them keeps demanding more. Their friends and family seem to care, but are not able (or feel unwilling) to give the support they need to keep going. They have a stack of self-help books that would build a small library, they’ve got podcasts out the wazoo, and at least 15 tabs open of articles they want to read about healing and having a more fulfilling life. Despite numerous tries including working with therapists, they feel lost and frustrated in trying to figure out where the “problem” lies. As they reflect on the past and explore their experiences (past and present) something feels wrong, but they can’t put a finger on it. They see that they’re the common denominator, a creeping feeling lingers in the back of their minds with the thought, as Taylor Swift would put it, “It’s me. Hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.”
They blame themselves for what’s going wrong in life. Friends and family remind them that it’s not always their fault, but it feels fake and empty when they say it. How can it not be their fault when they don’t see anyone else struggling in the same ways? Their support systems often say “call me if you need anything” and “I’m here for you,” but when they do reach out they feel as though their support systems don’t get it. They feel dismissed and never hear people outright accuse them of being overdramatic, but they seem to imply it. And let’s face it, my clients might not even have the bandwidth to reach out in the first place, which often feels like a burden and it further complicates even sending a text.
Reach out now. Each day does not need to feel like a struggle. I will walk with you on your journey toward a life you enjoy waking up to.
My clients often self-reflect and they seem to always come back to a personal defect, a reason why they are part of the problems at hand. It shows up in family dynamics and friendships, and just about every interpersonal situation. My clients find it really hard to share what’s going on, they say how they feel over and over, but don’t feel heard or understood. Their supports don’t show up for them the same way that they show up for people they support, which feels crushing and draining. Having a “support system” feels more like having a few people they might reach out to if they really really need to.
At times it feels like being able to pour themselves into work or projects is one of the best ways they can contribute to the world and they find themselves prioritizing work and putting their own care on the back burner.
Before they came to see me, they fear and often suspect they are simply broken people. Feeling unable to connect with others, feeling hopeless and helpless to create change in their lives, and stuck with the same frustrations they’ve been experiencing without any traction to get out of the rut of an unfulfilling life.
Like my clients, you deserve to have fulfilling support systems that you feel comfortable reaching out to, you deserve to experience life fully in a way that holds meaning for you, and you deserve to feel worthy of a life you look forward to living.
Having a life you enjoy waking up to and participating in is not out of your reach. If you want to feel more connected with others and yourself, I’d love to help you get there.
“Be messy and complicated and afraid and show up anyways.”
Glennon Doyle Melton